


Safe and Sound

by dimsumbao



Category: The Hobbit (2012), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Angst, Brothers, Canonical Character Death, Family, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, If you squint really hard you might see Durincest, Other, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-02-02
Updated: 2013-02-02
Packaged: 2017-11-27 22:01:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,264
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/666953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dimsumbao/pseuds/dimsumbao
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fili's has had to comfort Kili twice in his life. What happens when Fili can't be the big brother for a third time? Will Kili be able to comfort himself and his brother?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Little Bloodshed

**Author's Note:**

> First fanfic I've written before, so I hope it's okay!
> 
> Not meant to be Fili/Kili, only brotherly love.
> 
> Highly recommended you listen to this cover while or before reading: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WT491Q7lOYo

### Chapter 1: A Little Bloodshed 

They were just two young dwarves then. They knew of no greater pleasure than chasing each other up the halls of Erebor and eating the freshly picked apples of Dale. Their only pain came from scraped knees and motherly disapproval. Fili and Kili, for lack of a better term, had it good.

Ah, but even kings stubbed their toes.

The eldest brother, no more than 20 years into his life, cradled a small bag of pastries as he made his way back to Erebor. He knew that Kili would appreciate the sweets, especially after being bested at conkers again.

Up the winding streets, past the cheerful vendors. Fili would have reached the edge of the lively town had it not been for happenstance. A single pebble flew from his right, just missing his nose. He froze, giving himself a moment to process what had just happened. When he realized that someone had clearly thrown the rock he turned to look down the adjacent alley to see who that someone was.

It happened quickly, but as far as Fili was concerned not quick enough. He bolted into the shaded alley and had a human teen pinned on the ground, a forearm against his throat and a knee in his gut. Fili recalled there being other human boys around as well, but none of them came to aid their helpless comrade. Kili was hunched over on the ground, curled up in a tight as a pillbug ball.

After several punches, Fili had let the boy go, not so much out of pity as it was exhaustion. Both brothers leaned against the wall, side by side. Both sprinkled with blood and a couple of tears.

"Thanks." The youngest dwarf stood up after a moment of silence but kept his gaze to the ground. Fili saw that his nose was running with both blood and mucus. Even his lip was swollen and oozing.

"Always." Fili stood and was immediately pushed back into the wall, his baby brother pressing his face into his chest. Kili's arms firmly held his brother in place as he shook and sobbed, trying to forget his weakness.

Dis finished dressing the last of Kili's tiny wounds and gave both her sons a kiss on the head. Both Fili and Kili had been coddled, praised, and reassured the moment they returned to Erebor. There was a fair amount of backhanded comments, yelling, and hugs to go around. It was fair enough to say that the boys of Dale who had picked on Kili would not leave unpunished. But now they were alone again: just two brothers, one slightly more beaten and battered than the other. Fili closed his eyes and waiting for sleep to take this day and drop off at the next.

The next thing Fili knew he was awake, but the sky was still dark. He blinked the sleep from his eyes and looked about the room. No one except Kili was there. Oh Kili!

His little brother was twitching in his sleeping, making the saddest whines and sobs Fili had ever heard. He quietly slipped from his bed and made his way over to his brother's. He lightly perched himself on the edge of the blue sheeted bed and placed a soft hand on Kili's shoulder.

"Kili," he whispered to the troubled figure. "Kili, wake up."

Kili shuddered awake. His eyes darted across the ceiling until it found his brother's face. His chest rose and fell unevenly, matching his ragged breaths.

"Fili, I don't-" Kili started, trying to explain what had just happened in his dream. Fili cut him off with a ruffle of his chocolate hair. Kili's bottom lip slipped out just a little, giving the most adorable unintentional pout Fili had ever seen. "I don't want to be alone..."

"And you won't be, Kili!" He assured his brother with a hug. "When would I ever leave you alone?"

"You did today!" Kili protested to which Fili had to wince. It's true. Kili wouldn't have had to suffer had Fili not tried to surprise him with those stupid pastries.

"And I'm very sorry for it, Kili. I promise that as long as I live, you won't be alone." Fili looked at Kili, hoping that he would see that Fili truly had no intent of abandoning his brother. To his relief Kili nodded after a moment and hugged his brother tightly.

"Good." The two hugged for a while longer before Fili felt sleep starting to take him again. He tucked Kili in, smoothed his hair as their mother did every night, and then turned to return to his bed.

"Fili, wait!" Kili snatched his brother's night shirt and held him there.

"Kili I'm tired," Fili nearly whined. He turned to his brother who looked longingly at him. "I'm just going to be across the room. I'm not leaving."

"I know that!" Fili swore he saw Kili's hair bristle a little in embarrassment. "I just… I don't know if I can go back to sleep…"

"Can't you at least try?" Fili sighed and held Kili's hand, trying to pull it from his shirt.

"Can you sing to me?" Fili gave his brother an incredulous look which was reciprocated instantly with Kili's trademark smile. It was so innocent and just happy, it made it almost impossible to deny Kili anything. Unless you were Uncle Thorin, in which case you could say 'no' about 5% of the time.

"What do you want me to sing for you?" Kili released his brother and nestled under his covers.

"I dunno!" His smile was still there and it took everything in Fili's power to not roll his eyes. Cheeky brother. "Something to put me to sleep!"

Now, the only songs that Fili knew were about battles won and treasures lost. Hardly anything worth singing anyone to sleep. This meant that Fili would have to make up something up. Right here. On the spot. Thanks, Kili.

"Don't blame me when it sucks," Fili cleared his throat and began to hum a simple melody. Kili closed his eyes, giving a comfortable sigh.

"I remember tears streaming down your face when I said, "I'll never let you go"," Fili found the words came easily and fit well with the generic lullaby melody. 

"When all those shadows almost killed your light I remember you said, "Don't leave me here alone". But all that's dead and gone and passed tonight," Fili watched his brother's face. It relaxed as he sung, looking so much more natural than it had all day.

"Just close your eyes. The sun is going down, you'll be alright," Kili's chest rhythmically rose and fell beneath the blanket. "No one can hurt you now."

"Come morning light… You and I'll be safe and sound."

Kili did not have troubles sleeping after that night and Fili did not have to sing again. Well, not until Smaug came.


	2. To Be "Okay"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Immediately after fleeing from Smaug at Erebor, Fili and Kili have their self-assurances shaken.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aka: the chapter that made my beta cry (even though it's meant to be fluff???)
> 
> Highly recommended you listen to this cover while or before reading: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WT491Q7lOYo

### Chapter 2: To be "Okay"

The camp fire had smoldered down to nothing more than hot coals. To one side a barely aged Kili was wrapped up in a thick, rabbit-lined coat. Directly next to him was a slightly more aged Fili, wrapped in his own furs. As he let his head rest on what he deemed to be a softer pile of rocks and dirt, he thought about his home. About his feathered pillows and downed blankets. About the feasts that would spread for furlongs. About how that damned dragon took it away from him. From them.

The young prince Thorin refused to sleep. In his lap lay his sister, Dis. The embers reflected in his eyes; reflected the betrayal and loss. And for the time, the night remained silent and still.

"Fili…?"

. . .

"Fili?"

Maybe if he just lay really still.

"Fili."

"Oof!"

Fili rolled over to face Kili who looked incredibly unimpressed by his brother's attempts to ignore him. He felt his brother's boot pull away from his side.

"Kili, sleep. We have much traveling to do tomorrow." Fili didn't want to entertain the idea of listening to Kili whine while they traveled to the Blue Mountains.

Fili began to roll over again but there was a second swift boot to the side to stop him. Why even try?

"Kili what is it?" He squinted into the dark. Kili's eyes were a little glassier than usual. Aulë dammit.

"I can't sleep." Kili's bottom lip popped out just a little. At this point Fili wondered just how unaware Kili was about his appearances

"Aren't you tired?" Fili implored, raising his eyebrows just a bit. "We did a lot of-"

"Running?" Kili raised his eyebrows back at his brother. "Is that what you were going to say?"

"Traveling," corrected Fili.

"By… running."

"Either way we moved," Fili said quickly, trying to dismiss his brother's point.

"Fili. Kili." Both brothers snapped their heads to see their uncle glaring at them. He would be having none of their shit today. They lowered their heads sheepishly.

"Just try to sleep, Kili. Please."

"I-I can't. Every time I close my eyes I see that dragon. I see all that fire. Our kin burned before our eyes, Fili!" At this point Kili was nearly yelling.

"Kili!" Thorin barked, causing Kili to instantly slink deeper into his coat.

"How are you so okay?" Kili whispered to his brother, throwing glances at his uncle every now and then.

"What?" Fili looked back at Thorin as well.

"You're so calm." It was then that Fili came to realize just how much Kili looked up to him. Maybe he knew all along, but just never came to terms with it. How odd it felt being a role model.

"Well someone has to be," Fili looked away, suddenly feeling self-conscious.

"Teach me," Kili was filled with a renewed fire, one that had been extinguished all day. "I want to be okay, too."

Such an odd turn of phrase: I want to be okay, too. Kili kept making it sound like Fili was okay. How could he be okay with losing their life so suddenly? The truth of the matter was that he was not okay. 

"I'm not," Fili looked at his brother, frowning.

"Not what?"

"Okay."

"Oh."

The brothers shifted their gazes: Kili looked up at the sky, the stars veiled in clouds and smoke, while Fili looked towards the ground, dry and sprinkled with ashes. The two didn't speak for some time, however it was Kili who broke the silence.

"Will we ever be okay?"

The eldest brother shot a look at Kili that hovered somewhere between confusion and fear. He did not know, nor could he even begin to guess an answer. But for Kili's sake, he had to.

"Y-Yeah," Fili started, feeling his voice get caught in his throat. He coughed and tired again. "Yeah, of course we will. Just… Just not now."

"Oh," Fili sighed, thinking that his brother's curiosity was finally quelled. "When do you think that'll be?"

Oh Kili.

"Hey, come here," Fili unfolded his arms from under his coat and reached out to his brother.

Kili looked at the inviting gesture and rolled into it, stopping as his back hit his brother's chest. Fili folded his arms and coat over the both of them, enveloping them in warmth. The sense of familiarity Fili yearned for came to him as he held Kili close. The uncertainties that plagued Kili were fended off by Fili's arms. It was in that moment that they, somehow, felt okay.

As long as they were together, they would be okay.

"Fili?"

"Hmm?" Sleep was quickly starting to take him and he fought to keep himself awake.

"Can you sing that thing?" Kili turned his head to look up at his brother whose eyes were already closed.

"Mmm, what thing?" Fili opened one eye to look at his brother. "Oh, you mean that thing."

Kili nodded, still looking at his brother with those pleading eyes. Fili sighed heavily before giving a great yawn. He was in no shape to sing, let alone remember the words to a song he sang nearly 2 years ago. But as he began to remember the melody, images of Dale came rushing back to him, simultaneously filling him with homesickness and leaving him feeling empty. Lyrics were no longer the problem. It appeared Kili would get his song after all.

"Don't you dare look out your window, darling. Everything's on fire," Fili looked at the the smoldering charcoal, remembering their favorite stalls catching fire, the colorful streamers that were always festooned across the marketplace igniting like fuses.

"The war outside our door keeps raging on. Hold on to this lullaby," Kili's eyes began to droop. He also thought about home, but not as Fili did. He remembered getting his first bow from a stall run by an old hunter. He remembered running under rays of tinted sunlight with his brother. "Even when the music's gone."

"Just close your eyes. The sun is going down," Fili remembered the scorching heat of the flames rebounding off the mountain's walls and, too, closed his eyes. "You'll be alright. No one can hurt you now."

"Come morning light," Kili felt his brother's arms wrap tighter around him just as he fell into his sleep. Fili buried his face into his brother's tangled, messy hair, smelling the singed ends. The smell quickly dissipated as tears began to collect in Fili's eyes.

"You… You and I'll be safe and sound."

This was the last time Fili would sing his brother's lullaby. However, he would hear it just one more time.


End file.
